FINALLY Saw My Specialist And....

The news is pretty grim.

Up until yesterday, no one had offered an evaluation of how far along C.O.P.D. in me was. Well..this guy had few words to offer.


"Bad...really, pretty bad"

That didn't help!Now understand, he was looking at info from January and the X-Rays from November. I can only imagine how things are now. (It took a few lost appointments...no gas money...no insurance on van..to finally be able to keep an appointment. Thus, the lag.)

These last few days have been really tough, as well. What was interesting, when I was in the facility I could breathe a lot easier. I had to do this 6 minute walk with a blood oxygen monitor, and my level never dropped below 91%...generally stayed around 96%. Peaked at 99%. I am thinking that maybe this part of Texas has something really bothering my lungs...allergies perhaps.

Anyhow, I have to get a copy of the report next week and pass it along for my disability appeal. And I hate that....

I avoided applying for that program for a number of years. Even had this one kinda nutty woman yell at me at Camp Scooter SouthWest because I wouldn't lie and  say...." what you need to say to get the money". TRUE STORY!

I can't work. I mean even driving these last 3 days has been a problem. So I am out and about as much as I can be hoping to do some fundraising in the hopes something improves...whatever that may be.

What a disappointment! I come here to change my life after all the other medical stuff I prevailed over, only to be stunted by this. Akkk....

Best Job EVER!!!!!!

Well..it would have been.

Last Saturday I was supposed to go to a full day training to be certified as a Public Fireworks Technician! And at the end of the day, after a dinner was served, we'd be shooting stuff off. I was instructed to wear clothing that was non-synthetic so that..."The E.R. wouldn't have to peel anything off my skin should there be an accident"!

Went to bed early the night before so as not to be late. Woke up......

Lungs weren't happy. I used the Symbicort puffer and that helped, but not fast enough. Suffice to say, opportunity lost.

I wasn't sure I'd be able to do the job past the training. Wanted to see how I would handle the smoke from the displays. I mean, you light and then step back. I didn't know how much smoke would be created or blown my way.

But it was worth a shot.....no pun intended.

Back in the day, the 4th of July was my Christmas! I LOVE fireworks. Anything that flies, explodes, sparkles, or make hellish noises, I'm all in. This would have been an ideal gig.

Happens....

Anyhow....I still seek some manner of employ and await the determination of my disability claim. Something I avoided with vigor through the other maladies that struck me.

Been struck by Writer's Block lately. I think it's as much from wanting to write stuff like I used to as opposed to the "woe is me" material, as well as,  feeling stunted by frustration at my current circumstances.

Someday I'll write about my living situation....will be an interesting read. But in the meantime I do what I have to and hope for the best.

Thanks for reading....

Until next time.....